A Secret Self-Care Strategy

Time in nature offers strong safety signals!

“Self-care.” We hear the term everywhere. At this point, it can come across trite and overused. 

On this Valentine’s Day, where we celebrate the love of others, I want to encourage you not to forget about yourself. It might seem strange, at first blush. But I want to reiterate the words of Parker Palmer from his book “Let Your Life Speak.”

Self-care is NOT selfish. 

If your cup is empty; if you are running on fumes; if you’re exhausted and frustrated, you will feel too depleted to love those around you, let alone God. 

Jesus said “Love your neighbor as yourself” not instead of yourself.

I bring this up in case you worry that it’s wrong to do good things for yourself. 

I believe it’s not only not wrong, it is good and important.

This is one reason I want to share with you a secret self-care strategy that I was reminded of by a recent Wise Traditions podcast guest, Dr. Olivia Lesslar. (This episode hasn’t been published yet, so this is kind of a behind-the-scenes sneak peek of the episode. Make sure to subscribe to the Wise Traditions podcast on your favorite podcast app, so you don’t miss it when it comes out in early March!)

The secret self-care strategy is “safety signaling.”

Giving your body safety signals provides a strong foundation for a balanced, healthy life. Dr. Olivia suggested, in our conversation, that our bodies need to feel safe to heal. In other words, the body prioritizes survival over healing and if you feel threatened on any level, it will put healing on the back burner. It’s like hair loss. Keeping a full head of healthy, shiny hair is low on the body’s priority list if there are more pressing matters to attend to (chronic digestive issues or metabolism or hormone dysfunction, for example.)

In the same way, if the body feels attacked, it goes into survival mode. Survival comes first. Healing drops down the list. #priorities 

The idea is to make sure to give your body as many safety signals as possible to facilitate wellbeing. Offer it healthy, happy rhythms or routines that let your body know all is well. 

Some simple safety signals might include:

• eating three meals at the same time every day (which your body will interpret as a time of plenty/abundance)

• waking up and going to bed on a regular schedule

• avoiding screens after sundown, making sure to read or relax with music or your favorite hobby

• spending plenty of time outdoors, in natural settings like parks, mountains, and wide open fields

• giving and receiving touch (kissing and hugging friends and family, hand-holding, even petting your dog)

You get the idea. 

This is more than self-care. 

It’s a kind of a primal “safety-care” that provides mental and physical space to heal.

Comment below about which of the above you may want to incorporate. 

Or let me know what safety signals you already send to your body.

How do you love your body and let it know it’s going to be okay? 

And happy Valentine’s Day! 

You are a beautiful being and are very, very loved and safe. 

May this blog serve as a reminder to let your body know this, too, as often as you can!